Why Do Relationships Feel So Hard Sometimes?
The simple answer...because humans often hold others responsible for how they are feeling. It is the human awareness that holds others accountable for their thoughts, feelings, and actions when in fact you and you alone are in charge of how you view this life experience in every situation 100% of the time.
In romantic relationships we often look to our partners to help us feel better, or worse, we sometimes look to them to come to a negative space with us. This makes sense to do this when you rely on them for your happiness. When you remember that all humans are being called to a satisfying state of well being, it makes sense for people to not feel good when they are blaming others. It is not possible to “blame” and “appreciate” at the same time. In the eyes of the Law of Attraction, if you are in blaming mode your life experience must match. In this mode you will not be enjoying the ride as unwanted things will happen, you will have arguments, things won’t go your way, you will misplace items, you will spill something on a new white shirt, something will break, people you care for will leave your experience, you will be given every opportunity to remain below the line. The Law will assure it.
With a basic understanding of how Law of Attraction works, you can create relationships that are fulfilling, that are rewarding, that are fun, that are erotic, that are spontaneous, that are exciting, that are respectful, that are meaningful. And why would we want to do this? For no other reason than it feels good. It’s nice to be appreciated, it’s nice to be loved, it’s nice to be respected, and most of all, you deserve it. You deserve to be happy, you deserve to have a physical experience that consists of your desires.
Whenever we have an emotion that is below the line is an indicator that how you are viewing it, how you are looking at it, how you are focusing on any given situation, is flawed. You have an opportunity to look at the exact same situation with a different perspective, one that feels better every single time. This gets easier with practice!
Since most people aren’t clear in what they want, they live a life of many ups and downs. Often multiple relationships, including divorce etc, moving from one relationship to another always seeming to be the same. That’s why most relationships start well, are energetic and fun, and usually everyone is on their best behaviour. Over time however, when partners are no longer giving us the spotlight 24/7, we tend to blame them vs understand it isn’t anyone's job on the planet to help you feel better.
For every time in your life experience you felt an emotion below the line you were being given valuable information. You were being told what you really wanted because whatever the focus was that caused the bad emotion the opposite is what you really want. We must tell the story of what we want and when you do this the Laws of the Universe will deliver it. It is the Law.
It doesn’t matter if you are starting a new relationship or in one for decades, the Law will respond to where you are emotionally within that relationship. With technology today many relationships are digital, meaning it’s very easy to read into something that doesn’t feel good. If you are having a bad day, or feeling uneasy, nervous, worried, frustrated or any emotion that is less than satisfying it makes sense to read and take things out of context. To read something and be angry, to read something and feel disappointment, to read something and want to throw in the towel. The trouble with this is we then blame the one who sent the text vs acklowdeding that it is the point of view you are holding is hurtful and not helpful to you, which by default will make you hurtful to others.
When you decide that your happiness is more important you will acknowledge you are the one reading it, you are the one choosing how to respond, you are the one choosing to be upset, you are the one choosing to blame, you are the one who is making up the stuff that doesn’t feel good. There is always another choice, you can choose to believe you may not understand the context, you can choose to believe that you are being provided more clarity, you can choose to believe that they mean no harm, you can choose to believe that for every emotion that doesn’t feel good you are growing and if not for the very thing that annoyed you, you wouldn’t grow, you wouldn’t expand, you can choose to find appreciation in their nativity, you can choose to find comfort in knowing they are beautiful at their core, you can choose to find goodness in everything, you just have to be willing to.
If you feel like you are being blamed, it is because you are choosing to hold the other accountable for how you are feeling. This is a perfect opportunity for self reflection, ask yourself what do I want? It is always the opposite.
Ask the Universe to deliver to you the energy you desire, the fun loving, carefree, self assured, thoughtful, kind, attractive, sexy, respectful, spontaneous, honest, helpful, creative, independent, well meaning relationship you want. When you do this and believe it is on its way, you will have the relationships of your dreams, work, friends, family, all of them become better. Make it your intention to find the well being in all things, it changes your life.